If you want to stop lying, the first step is admitting you have a problem. People lie for a lot of reasons, but it is behavior that can develop into a destructive habit. A little “white lie” every now and then to save someone’s feelings isn’t the kind of lying being discussed. The kind of lying being discussed is the lying that is intentional, has a self serving purpose and is destructive behavior.
Do What You Want
One of the major reasons people lie is so they can continue to do what they want to do. In other words, you may have a drinking problem and are unable to maintain control of your binge drinking. Instead of admitting you have a problem, you lie to others and yourself about your ability to stop the binge drinking. “I can stop if I want to… ” is commonly heard when someone is trying to justify destructive behavior. They need to stop lying and admit the truth which is their drinking is out of control.
People also lie to manipulate others. This is also destructive behavior. You may tell your coworkers lies in order to get them to do your work. You might lie to your family so you are able to get whatever it is you want including time with friends or the right to buy whatever you think you need. One spouse will lie to another in order to cover up an affair. Friends lie to one another in order to manipulate the person into going someplace, doing some activity or to talk them into handling a difficult personal situation. The problem with all these lies is that they can become habitual. When that happens, it is time to stop lying.
Of course, one of the main reasons people lie is to prevent personal embarrassment. Instead of answering a question honestly, you lie in order to escape punishment or censure or criticism. These kinds of lies are also found in every kind of relationship including family, friends and co-workers. Lying (except for the occasional white lie) is never a good behavior. It establishes a pattern of deceit and escapism. Instead of confronting the truth and dealing with the consequences, you lie to control the situation. When you are ready to stop lying, it requires thought intervention so that you are able to produce the truth instead of the lie.
Learning to Accept Reality
Habitual lying is behavior intended to enable you to escape reality. Instead of dealing with the truth at the moment, you invent a lie to manipulate the situation or what others are thinking about you. It is self-centered behavior also, because until you stop lying, the half-truths and out right lies are intended to protect your image of yourself. Because it is your unconscious insecurities and self-image that is leading to the continual lying, it only makes sense that self hypnosis is an effective means of putting a stop to the lying.
With self hypnosis you learn how to clear your mind of the worries that make you feel as if you should use lying as a defense against reality. You sort through your thoughts and feelings of inadequacy and explore the many reasons in your life for lying. When you have admitted you need to stop lying problems related to your lies are impacting your relationship and ability to function. With self hypnosis you can learn how to accept the truth and reinforce positive thoughts that will lead to self confidence. When you are confident, it is much easier to stop lying.